Chicago 12 Year Olds Drink Harder than You

Chicago students, rejoice! You’ve received top honors. A Red Eye/Chicago Tribune article published in February reported that Chicago is the top bing-drinking city in America (it’s also the home of College Drinker — go figure).

The federal government’s Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, which released its ranking of the 15 largest metropolitan areas last month, found that 25.7 percent of people over age 12 in the Chicago area were considered binge drinkers, more than any other metro area surveyed and well over the national average of 22.7 percent.

Age 12? Are you kidding? I know some people get started early, but damn, that’s plain ridiculous. I don’t suppose those same 12 year olds are shot-gunning cans of Natty Ice and beer bonging malt liquor down a staircase. If they are, I want to meet them, they’re America’s future.

And don’t be fooled by the picture — it’s straight vodka.

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